Wednesday, March 11, 2015

Sibling Love

The older my children get, the greater my desire to see them interact with their deceased older sister. I've mentioned before how I often find myself wondering things like, "Would Peter have better behavior if Lucy were here leading the way, setting an example?" I worry that Zoë isn't learning gentleness or other things that only an older sister can teach you...and it pains me deeply when I think of the relationship she is missing out on with her sister. I can only hope that as she grows up, she'll have beautiful friendships with other women and girls who will treat her like a sister.

But I have to say, the bond between these two clowns is pretty remarkable. Even my friend's notice and make comments about how sweet they are with each other. (Not 100% of the time, of course).

Just today, when Zoë got upset while we were out running errands, she cried to me that she just wanted her brother, Peter.

I could be wrong, and I'm sure there are studies out there somewhere, but it seems that living children of parent's who have lost a child have a unique relationship. I've received several emails and been told stories from several people about the love they have for and connection they have with their deceased sibling, even if they'd never met them. I'm so glad my children have a very personal and real frame of reference when it comes to death. I'm glad it is a subject we talk openly about in our home.

As they continue to grow and progress, it will be interesting to see how their relationship changes and develops. How much will they think about Lucy? How much will they wonder, just as I do, how their lives would be different with her here? Will Peter and Zoë remain best of friends? I don't know what it's like to have only one other sibling, as well as them to be of the opposite gender. But I have high hopes they'll continue to have a special bond.

Oh, how I love all three of my munchkins.


She was so worn out from skiing that she fell asleep at El Chubasco. 










2 comments:

  1. Oh, how I pray for the same thing. I have a boy and girl. My daughter is a twin and we lost her sister shortly before birth. It kills me that she doesn't have her sister here. I hope and pray that my two children have a special bond, especially since we don't know if we will be able to have more children. They are both very young still but love each other so much.

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  2. I love the video so much. I can see Mo and Myla will be just like this. In the meantime, I can't help but think how much different life would be if Max were here taking care of them all. XOXO

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