Why I Like Myself

Tuesday, October 22, 2013

See those jeans I'm wearing? I can't fit into them anymore. I'm not a far cry from being able to, just about 7 pounds from being able to. 

But see that face? And that stance? And that heart? They are the same. 

But here's the deal-- I am ALWAYS, ALWAYS saying that the reason I love someone is not because of how they look. It's just not. You could be the most beautiful creature on earth and if you are selfish and uninteresting, I just wouldn't care that much about you. (Sorry, it's true.) 

I don't love my friends because of how they look. I have never once described Crocky, or Sarah or John or Rachael or Anna or Eden or Justin or Brooke or my sister or mother or sister-in-law in the following way...

"Our friendship is so wonderful. We really get a long and enjoy being together. But the best part about them is how absolutely thin and flawless they are. It really makes for an amazing relationship. "

It's not even part of the friendship/relationship equation. 

It would sound more like...

"They make me laugh so hard I can't even stand it. Such a great sense of humor! We've been through so much together. They are such a great listener. They get me. They bring out the best in me. They are so kind to me. They do such thoughtful things for me. I truly love them for who they are."

And I believe this. It is total truth for me. In fact, it seems like there comes a point in every relationship that you don't even really see the physical. It's not even there. It's just you and the person. Their spirit. 

So here's my problem. If I feel this way about my friends and those I love, why is it so hard to give myself the same treatment? I mean...why do I like myself? Is it because of how thin I am? Is that really the only thing? Because it is the LAST thing I look for in friendship. (Ok, it's not even on the list.) 

But day after day I say to myself, "I've got to get back into those jeans!" Do I? Well...if the only way Molly is ever going to like Molly is if she gets back into those jeans...then I guess I better figure out how to make that happen. Because living with myself is not going to be any fun.  Maybe I should try liking myself for other reasons than my weight. 

I'm sure I could find something worthwhile...

So why do YOU like yourself?


  1. Oh Molly... I think we all do that. And by we - I mean women. It's not fair, is it? Give yourself a break. I love you because you are strong, inspiring, a spit-fire gal, empathetic, and so gosh-darn sensitive to the spirit in others. See? Don't you love yourself already?? I sure do. Good message in this post. Love you for you.... whatever that may entail. :)

  2. excellent point. and my weight always makes me hate myself. but then again, i don't really like who i am inside, either. its hard for me to find something i like about me. like... really hard. i seriously keep trying to type something and then i erase it with, "well... not really, because actually..." so. i will work on it.
    but Candace is right. there is lots to love about you. i love how authentic you are. i love that you say how things are. i love your voice and your acting and running skills. i love your style. and i love that you try so hard at motherhood- even though its SO DANG HARD!!!! i love your humor. your love for Vic. i wish i could meet you one magical day. oh. and... i love that you blog :) xo

  3. beautiful post. right there with you.

  4. I agree.... I think women always find something wrong with their body. You are a beautiful person, inside and out. Throw those jeans away ~ then you won't keep thinking about them. ;)

  5. I found your blog from a link on a friend of a friend... and then there is my dear friend Holly Decker in your comment section. Small world! I love this post, it's so true that we measure our friends so generously, and ourselves so viciously! I'm on a stint of self-loathing at the moment, and its so ridiculous that I can dislike myself, and then beat myself up about disliking myself! But I know that what others like about me is not erased by my puffy prednisone cheeks, or weight gain, so I should cut myself some slack.
    Speaking of slack, Holly Decker!!! How about I elaborate on just how lovable you are, because it's so stinkin obvious to anyone who knows you! You are SOOO talented (musically, artistically, spiritually, ETC ETC!), you are a fun and amazing wife, mother, and friend! You are beautiful, and classy, and down to earth yet silly and funny. You can be laid back, and a hard worker at the same time. You are totally loyal and sweet, and seriously I just love your guts, and I wish I could go on a long walk with you every morning and talk about our days and problems, and funny things that happen because you are an honestly refreshing person to be around.

  6. Ditto to everyone. Lucia and Holly. Wow. Agreed. I was just having a pity party myself, this post really uplifted me. Thank you, I think I do have a better time and more friends when I am a bit less enviable and by that I mean, I would like to lose a few! Thanks!


Powered by Blogger.