Feeling Down....really

Thursday, May 2, 2013
Those post vacation blues are a real killer. It seems to be worse than usual this time around. It snowed today. IT SNOWED TODAY. Happy May. So, that's rill fun.

And...I auditioned for a show. I had a pretty killer audition. I rocked the dancing. Had a bit of a cold so my singing wasn't my best. But I did well. Really well.  And I didn't make it. So that's a bummer.

Zoë has a cold and is a fussy little thing. My house is a mess.

I just don't feel like I have a grip on things right now. My house, my kids, my marriage--and there is that nagging feeling again like I should be doing "more". Must get off Instagram and Facebook every second and live my own life. Must.

When late afternoon hit today I started having a mini anxiety attack. I just started feeling so overwhelmed by everyday life. Work out. Clean the house. Shower. Get dressed. Feed kids. Clean up. Clean some more. Get out of the house or go crazy. Make lunch. Clean. Make dinner. Do laundry. Mental breakdown!

I called my friend Stacey to see if she could take the kids for a few hours so I could unpack bags and take a breath or two. THANK GOODNESS FOR FRIENDS LIKE HER. So here I am...sorting through my thoughts and feelings. Crying off and on. Realizing it is May. Five years without her. May.

I guess I don't know what else to say. Time to go unpack.

“Deep in the human unconscious is a pervasive need for a logical universe that makes sense. But the real universe is always one step beyond logic."-Frank Herbert


  1. I get BAAAD post vacation blues. The vacation distracts me so much, I almost feel like my old self. Then I come home to my "new normal" and I want to die. I relate and I'm sorry. Really sorry.

  2. I'm so sorry. :( I totally get that feeling of being overwhelmed by the routine and the never-ending cycle of daily life. I say turn on some angry music and sing your heart out in a long, hot shower. Stay in there until the water runs cold. :) And lock the door so that no children interrupt your jam session! That's how I de-stress. :)

  3. I'm sorry, Molly! Can I come watch your beautiful sweet kids?? Better yet, I can come take you to Sage's - you'd LOVE it!! I look up to you in so many ways - one of which is the genuine and sincere way you write and express yourself. I'm still putting my feelers out for Vic - I feel for you both. You are a fabulous person that I love. Hugs your way!

  4. I'm so sorry. I tried to bottle some Arizona sun and heat but when I went to the post office with it, they said it was perishable and wouldn't mail it. I get bad days. And bad weeks. I heard a line from a song (can't remember which) "what you call 'a moment' I call life. So we're having a life...

  5. Just seeing this... SO glad you came to the park on Friday!


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