Just a Thought

Thursday, October 25, 2012

I've had a reoccurring (recurring?) thought lately. I wonder what you think about it. I can only speak from my perspective and experience...let me explain:

As I look around at your lives, your houses, the clothes you wear, the cars you drive, the way you earn money, where you live...sometimes I am envious. Sometimes I wish I had your house, or your furniture, or your car, and especially your house keeper. :) 

But this is the thought that keeps coming back to me: We all have the same life--it just looks different. We all (as mothers) love our children, clean the house, feed our families, get dressed, connect with other people, do laundry, try to stay healthy, enjoy having fun, wish for more sleep, etc. 

We do the same things, we want the same things (love, acceptance, belonging, security, a clean house). We look different, our "things" look different, but our lives are the same. 

Its nothing new or earth-shattering, but it simplifies it for me. My baseboards desperately need to be painted, my basement needs major TLC (more baseboard issues---calking---ugh), my mudroom still isn't finished a year after we started building it, Vic needs a new car in a big bad way, I may not have a solid, well-built home and the wardrobe I want but my life is exactly the same as yours. Food, shelter, water, love. 

Same life. Different look. 

Here are some of the looks of my life lately:

At the doc

Biking to church. Can't get photo to straighten. You'll have to tilt your head or your computer. 

Just an ordinary October morning in Park City...

* Obviously there are exceptions to this. And I DID NOT feel this way for years after Lucy died. I felt my life was VERY different from most people. Just trying to survive and not lose my mind was my main goal.  This is a huge generalization but it helps me realize we are all here trying to do our best and be happy and what we see on the outside is just an illusion. 


  1. This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.

    1. Jan--I know you said I don't "need" to post your comment...but can I? I don't know how else to get a hold of you (email address, etc). I loved what your comment. I always love learning about life from the perspective of someone else.

      You are a warrior. I pray for peace for you.

  2. I think what you may be saying in a few words is that in the end, no matter what we have acquired in life (material things), we really are all the same. Some of us have different experiences and maybe some have a little more glamorous experiences or because of their hard work or their profession, they have more luxuries, but really, in the end we are all the same. The thing that I realized when my husband passed away and then both parents, all within 7 months, is that we come into life without anything at all. When we leave, we don't take much with us either. It is that time in between that counts....not so much what we have but the relationships we build, the people we help, the friends we cherish, the family that we help grow, and the way we go about living our lives is what comes to mean the most to us. For me, my family and friends mean everything to me. Sure, I have to work to make a living and luckily work with some really wonderful people, but in the end, it is my relationships that I will cherish the most and miss the most when they are no longer here. You are right - the things we see outside are sometimes not real and don't count in the big scheme of things. I love your honesty. I love that you are willing to share a part of yourself with us. I love that you set such a good example. Your pictures are so precious. Thanks!!

  3. Hi Molly - I have read and loved your blog for years! I think of Lucy all the time and love it when you write about her. I have a request...my grandmother just died. She was the heart of our family and I'm grieving heavily. I have a number of health issues(likely from stress...I have a little girl, Katie, with special needs). I would love it if you would say a small prayer for me to get through the next week. Travelling for the funeral with bad bronchitis and attending the wake, etc. Thanks!! xoxo

  4. LOVE your thoughts! and love your use of legos, very creative!!! No snowmen here in Arizona though, maybe I'll have to come visit you in Park City :) Someday we will bring our children there because the parking lot of the Outlet Mall is where I met my husband for our first date (long story) but as they say the rest is history! Which history looks a lot like yours, just in different ways, right!

  5. well said, friend. it made me feel not so different from you and my fellow bloggers... especially those doctor pictures ( i swear i live at that place having my kids so close in age! if its not one check up its another!) i needed the reminder that we all have laundry to do and all still need sleep. love to you and yours, darling.

  6. i completely agree, molly. i think it's the same with our emotions, too: so often what we feel is the same even though we may have very different experiences that make us feel a certain way. thank you for your lovely blog and inspiration!

  7. I loved this. It made me feel warm and fuzzy to think about the legion of mothers across the world and think that we really are the same. We're all in it together.

  8. I love this. Blogs and Facebook allow us to share our lives and view other people's lives, but like you said, even though it looks different... we are all basically doing the same thing. I think it's so easy to get caught up on how everyone else's lives look so fabulous, their clothes are fashionable, their kids never act out, etc. I think that's why I love reading your blog so much, even though I've never met you. I remember seeing pictures of the nursery and thinking it looked like something out of a magazine. Actually, pretty much every picture that you post looks like it should be in a magazine. (And, I always think "I wish my house looked like that!") I won't even get started on your clothes and how cute you always look in your pictures. But, along with all of those pictures, you are also so honest about your feelings, your trials... everything. I appreciate that. Thanks for giving us all something so awesome to read and relate to!

  9. Well put... I Love it! And your kids are so cute

  10. While reading this post my 4 year old saw the picture of Peter and said, "Is that me?" I think that's the best validating response you can get that you are right on in your thoughts.

  11. I love this and believe it with all my heart. Jealousy is really such an ugly thing and it sucks all of the life and happiness out of people. I much prefer being happy for myself and for other people, even when their lives seem better/easier/fancier than mine. Thanks for such a good post! I needed it tonight.


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