Today is December 11th. Lucy would be 2 1/2 today. What would she be saying? Would she know who Santa is? What would she want for Christmas? What funny stories would I have to tell about her? How long and blond, curly and beautiful would her hair be now? Would she be crawling out of her crib and coming to my bedside to say, "Mommy, more food. Elmo, play!" (we looked forward to that so much. We really did). Would she kiss and talk to and hug the baby growing inside of me? Would she have successfully used the potty by now?
The questions in my heart are endless.
The pain at this time of year bottomless.
My blessings are still bounteous.
My love for my Lucy never ending.
It's been 6 months. Feels like 6 days. And all the while I have been surrounded by almost indescribable love. I will blog in the coming week about a labor of love performed on our part for Christmas. I hope I will be able to do it justice. It will blow you away, as it did me. How do I thank you for your prayers and concern, your emails, thoughtful gifts, hugs, food, phone calls...Hands of heaven on earth.
I love you, Lucy.
I love you, Vic.
"Angels are all about us, and their holy sovereign, the Father of us all, is divinely anxious to bless us this very moment. Mercy is his mission, and love is his only labor. John Donne said once: “We ask our daily bread, and God never says, ‘You should have come yesterday.’ … [No, he says,] ‘Today if you will hear [my] voice, today I will hear yours.’ … If thou hast been benighted till now, wintered and frozen, clouded and eclipsed, damp and benumbed, smothered and stupefied till now, God yet comes to thee, not as in the dawning of the day, … but as the sun at [full] noon, to banish all shadows” (Collected Sermons).
-Elder Jeffrey R. Holland, "Look to God and Live"
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