Sacred Times

By Molly Bice-Jackson - 7:38 AM


I haven't wanted to write just for the sake of writing. I want it to come from the heart. I have been waiting for the right time for my next entry. There are too many sacred experiences, too many thoughts to share, but I will try to put into words the new life we are experiencing.

While we were in the hospital with Lucy, Bishop Barnes gave Vic a beautiful blessing. I remember him saying something about "this new path and new life for the three of you." I knew at that moment that things would never be the same. Truthfully, I knew at the moment Lucy started choking that things would never be the same, I just didn't know how. Let me tell you how now:

The sky is bluer. The sun is brighter. The rain is wetter. The trees are greener. And every interaction with every human being is real and significant. No matter the length, no matter the person, no matter what is said. I feel an overwhelming sense of love and unity for the entire human family.

This entire experience has been so sacred. Extremely difficult, but sacred. We have cried several different kinds of tears these past few weeks. The most interesting for me have been tears of humility and gratitude. The well of giving is deeper than I imagined possible. In the days surrounding Lucy's funeral, feet were literally worn out in our service. I have a future blog entry entitled, "Shoes on a Plate" dedicated to those who served us, and continue to serve us. It will astound you what a ward, branch, and earthly family can do.

A quote shared at Lucy's funeral by John Flint has been particularly comforting to me:
" We have again the warning voice sounded in our midst, which shows the uncertainty of human life; and in my leisure moments I have meditated upon the subject, and asked the question, why it is that infants, innocent children, are taken away from us, especially those that seem to be the most intelligent and interesting. The strongest reasons that present themselves to my mind are these: This world is a very wicked world; and it...grows more wicked and corrupt...The Lord takes many away, even in infancy, that they may escape the envy of man, and the sorrows and evils of this present world; they were too pure, too lovely, to live on earth; therefore, if rightly considered, instead of mourning we have reason to rejoice as they are delivered from evil, and we shall soon have them again..." -Joseph Smith

Thank you for sharing in our sacred experience.

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25 Loving Lines

  1. Incredible.

    Thank you for your insights about life.

    Thank you for your friendship.

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  2. Molly,
    My name is Suzanne and I have met you before...I am Emily's step mom and Darin Southam's mom.

    I have waited intently for the news on your family. My heart is truly broken for you, but I rejoice at your courage. You and Vic are special people. What a impact your "Lucy" story has had on me and my family. I too, look at things so differently now. I appreciate every moment with my family. I am trying to be a better person.
    I wish for you and Vic the blessings from heaven and continued peace. I miss Lucy too and I didn't even know her. What a blessing she is to all of our lives.
    Love to you.

    Suzanne

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  3. Only the special ones get to go home early. I also felt an overwhelming sense of love. I love that quote.

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  4. That poem was wonderful to read. I am looking forward to your "Shoes on a Plate" post. I am very glad to hear that you have been so supported these past few weeks. You are all three an inspiration!

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  5. Thank you for sharing that Molly. You have a way of looking at things that really makes me think about things in a different way. Thanks for sharing your insights. I think it's wonderful that you feel you can do that instead of keeping all of it inside.

    We're here. Let us know when you need us.

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  6. What an inspiration. Thank you for your beautiful words, and sharing this experience. It has made me want to be a better person, and look at things in life in a different light. Thank you.
    Love, Brooke

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  7. I think of the three of you every day. Like I said, it feels weird and wrong that life is going on as usual. And yet, it isn't "the usual" because I am not "the usual". I too feel and see things differently. I am so grateful for that.

    Joy

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  8. I don't know you but I want you to know that you are definitely amazing. I am truly sorry to hear about this tragedy and I thank you for sharing your story. I will definitely look at things differently just because of hearing your story. What a special daughter you have and I know you will meet again and until then she will be with you every moment.

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  9. Molly, you have gone deeper and deeper into who you really are...and its giving me goosebumps ALL OVER , I mean, I could feel it on my ANKLES. and EARS. And then my eyes were watering. You are a blessing. I was really quite worried that the earth would dim and the skies would grey for you...and I cannot even tell you how it felt to read that just the opposite has happened as your very world has been intensified and brightened by love in this time of sacredness and stillness. YOu are writing things that in future days will sustain YOU...and for now, you continue to bless as we all continue to pray for you daily.

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  10. Everyone involved with Lucy's life and death have been changed and touched by the tremendous outpouring of love for your family and for each other. People felt and saw a small glimpse of what Heaven will be like.

    Vic and Molly you have inspired me to be better so that I can see that glimpse of Heaven, again.

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  11. Molly, I have thought about you and Vic so much the last while, and I appologize for not doing more. Lucy's passing has stirred up a whole lot of emotions that I had thought were past. From my little sisters passing and almost loosing our little Millie and myself a few years ago.

    Thank you so much for sharing all that you have these last few weeks with the rest of us. That quote your Bishop shared at the funeral really struck me then as well. Heaven truly is closer than we know, and it takes such great faith to know that he truly does have the plan all layed out. And all we need to do is have faith that he has us in his hands regardless of what we are asked to endure in this life.

    I love you, Melissa

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  12. Molly,

    Your strength and testimony of faith are great strengths to me in my life. Thank you for sharing your thoughts on your blog, and for being my friend. Love, Lana

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  13. Molly,

    I don't know you, but found your blog through the Waite's blog as I was leaving a comment for them regarding the passing of their daughter Camille. I am so sorry to hear about the tragic loss of your daughter and want you to know that you will also be in our families prayers. The slide show and music with Lucy was beautiful. Take care and I hope that each day is easier than the one before.

    ~Kara Costello

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  14. I pray that I can be the mom that you are in trials as huge as this. Brave. Faithful. Steadfast. Optimistic.

    You are blowing me away with your strength every time I come to this blog. There is definitely a plan and you stand witness of that! Is it possible to love you guys and love lucy without even knowing you?

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  15. Thanks Molly! My life is richer because of your strength, friendship, and testimony.

    I love you

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  16. Well written Molly. I have loved reading these posts, and while I would never wish this kind of heartbreak on anyone it's been neat to see how "our light affliction, which is but for a moment, worketh for us a far more exceeding and eternal weight of glory." (2 Cor. 4:17). You two are truly an example of enduring well.

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  17. I love you both. Thanks for the light in your words. I belive it is true. Mom Marlene

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  18. Molly, I walked into a RS enrichment meeting the Saturday after we got back, and got chocked up. I now know the true power of what a ward can do at any time, any where. It is an amazing phenomenon; one that should never be taken lightly. I may never make jokes about RS again. (Maybe) Jenny

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  19. When I initially think of death, especially Lucy's, I think of sorrow, and loss, and pain, and tears, and emptiness. Then I start worrying about you, my friends. I worry that you will feel those feelings, and what's worse, I worry that you may have to experience them alone. Then I read your powerful thoughts, I hear your testimony of the gospel, and I see images of that angel that came to stay with you. It is then that I know that I shouldn't worry, I know that you are all right. I can't tell you how much that means to me, to be able to check in on you (even through a blog) and know that you are not alone. Thank you for literally keeping us posted and allowing us to be guests in this sacred experience. I love you both.

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  20. You don't know me, but I have been keeping up with your blog. I found you through the Olsen's.

    You are amazing. Your strength is so inspiring. You and your family are in my thoughts.

    April

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  21. What a beautiful post. Wanted to let you know that we f i n a l l y contributed to lucy's fund. sorry it took so long. We love you guys and are still constantly thinking & praying for you.

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  22. here's the thing about you guys. it takes truly phenomenal people to let something as tragic as this shape them into finer human beings. instead of woah-is-me-ing you are improving. you see the world as a better place rather than more treacherous. you are using this experience to magnify your potential instead of letting it rip you to shreds. i am in awe of you. i know it is hard to be objective about yourself, so let me try to help you understand:
    Y O U A R E A M A Z I N G !!!!

    rachel r

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  23. I know I'm a complete stranger who randomly came across your blog, but I need to thank you with all of my heart for your strength and inspiration!! My six sisters and I lost our only brother in January. He was just 37 and he left behind 4 beautiful children. My heart aches for him every day and some days the pain is still unbearable. I am amazed though, at how you have been able to see so many blessings from your loss and how you have been able to find more beauty in life and in others. You have taught me that Heavenly Father is trying to shower me with His love and if I would stop hiding under my umbrella, I'd be able to feel his love pouring down on me and I too would be able to see a bluer sky and a brighter sun. I am truly sorry for your loss -- I know how your heart is aching, but I am also truly thankful for your strength and courage. My brother was a very special person whose life touched many, and I know that Lucy was too -- her life has touched mine without ever having met. Thank you for sharing her with other!

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  24. Thank you for sharing this Molly. Again, you astound me. Every entry brings me to tears.

    Love you guys.

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